Reviews of Cheap Toys and More

Toys Basketball Game

Toys Basketball PackageHot off the trail of the Pocket Basketball Game, here’s another basketball dollar store toy, the Toys Basketball net and ball. No, it’s not a mistake, it’s actually called the Toys Basketball. Sorry, I’m going to have to ruin this for you already. This is the worst of the dollar store toys I have reviewed so far. Yes, it’s even worse than the New Concept Bike. At least the New Concept Bike sort of worked and did what it was supposed to do, I think.

The Toys Basketball just sucks, not so much for the toy itself, more for what it’s meant to do. I mean it looked promising enough, it’s a basketball net with a ball that’s supposed to stick to a table or window. But, with even more poor quality parts than normal, it sucks. If you want to find out why, keep reading, if it’s enough to know it sucks so you can move on, nows your chance.

Toys BasketballPictured right is the toy measured up against the running joke 11 Inch Army Soldier, who is actually 11.5 inches and recently got an equipment upgrade and accessories. The basketball net on it’s tippie-toes is almost as tall as the 11 inch army guy. The reason I make the reference to it being on it’s tippie-toes is due to it’s blue suction cupped bottom. Since it’s not suction cupped down to the table, it’s a little taller than it would be.

Toys Basketball Suction CupWhy isn’t it suction cupped down? Well, it doesn’t suction cup. There’s a small dent in the suction cup so it doesn’t stick at all. It was also packaged so the suction cupped was bent and with the thicker rubber used, it wants to stay in that position since it won’t stick. To top it off, the basketball net doesn’t even stand. It’s leaning against the army guy! Strike 1, it doesn’t stick like it’s supposed to.

Toys Basketball Window SetupThe suction cup can be removed from the base of the basketball net and placed behind the backboard for vertical suction.

Oddly enough, it will actually stick to a window, if you use a perfectly flat surface(like a window), push really hard and don’t touch it afterward. This will obviously make it hard to play with seeing as how the basketball will make the net fall from the suction.

Toys Basketball BallOh, don’t get excited yet, it’s still not going to work. The basketball is so light, the netting will hold the ball up unless it’s been stretched out. Even then, the net itself will barely stay up on a window and won’t stand up on a table. Throwing the basketball at it will only serve to keep knocking it over whether you get it in the net or not. If the ball comes in contact with the net, it’s falling over. That, to me, is Strike 2, the ball doesn’t fall through!

Now, they say not to judge things by their cover, or in this case package. This is why I left this till the last. The back of the package contains the instructions on how to use the Toys Basketball, but I can’t help be reminded of lolcatz. The cheesy lolcatz instructions make Strike 3!

Toys Basketball Can Shoot Toys Basketball Can Cling

With all these strikes, it’s not basketball anymore, it’s baseball. The people didn’t change, the game did.

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